Reassurances discovered

Reassurances discovered

Amazing what kind of lesson we are able to learn, through observations. Only by laying down and watching the surroundings.

As I was observing a small tiny kitten, limping along towards its mother. The mother was feeding the other four kittens milk. As soon as the mother saw the injured kitten, she quickly put her attention on the injured one. Nothing much shes able to do actually, and for some strange reason, I can actually feel what she’s feeling.

The injured kitten limps along, trying to catch up with its brothers and sisters. Tired from the effort, the injured kitten slumps down. While laying there, the brother comes over and started play fighting with the injured kitten. It didn’t take long at all for him to release hiis sister is injured. He stops and licks her for a little while.

This is the sweetest thing I had seen for a long time. The brother lays next to the injured kitten, I feel he knows theres nothing to be done about it. As I continue to observe, his just sorting next to the injured kitten, probably for comforting. I feel his worry, even though I ain’t even sure his old enough to even know such a thing as death.

It’s heart breaking watching this injured kitten limping around. It’s really a sad thing to watch. Struggling so desperately trying to go from one place to the next. It’s really affecting me at the moment, it’s a sad thing to even see.

The mother cat and her kittens never went to school, was never educated. Yet how can these lovely creatures, know what to do in life. How would the brother know to care, being protective of the injured kitten. Surely his too young to experience a injury of his own. Therefore how would he know what to do, in being protective.

These kittens play all day, sleep and play again. Jumping on each other, pouncing on each other. There’s no storage of good anyway, there’s no money in the bank. They don’t work and earn money. Yet there’s something about them, makes me really envious.

Even though they don’t know where they are going to sleep tonight. Nor worry about what is the next meal going to be. As they pounce on each other, playing as a family, brotbers and sisters. They are enjoying themselves, they are happy.

Its amazing watching the kittens annd the mother cat. The mother cat shows truly great dedication towords her babies. The kittens already displaying their knowledge. Probably by internal influence, by some instinct or feelings they have, automatically knowing what is happening around them.

The mother cat, showing great love and dedication. She will always be support of you, that’s something for certain. The kitten will die soon. I am looking at it now, I don’t think the injured kitten will last the day. Unfortunately, depression and outrageous.

The mother cat once again, reminding me a mother’s love. The rawness in power of a mother’s love. Truly there’s nothing that exist, comparing to a mother’s love. It’s powerful and mighty, the way things shall be.

And the kitten is just enjoying life, pouncing on everyone he is able. Lessons learnt here, is enjoy each other. The power of observations.

Written by Tan Nguyen
26th of December 2015

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If only you feel what I feel

If only you feel what I feel

Walking for just a little while,
You would feel what I feel,
Looking at the world through my eyes,
You would feel what I feel,
Experiencing the soul crushing moments,
You would feel what I feel,
Know what I know,
Think as I think,
Hurt as I am hurt,
Pain as I am in pain,
Happy as I am happy,
Try being me for a little while,
If only you feel what I feel,
Would you be able to survive,
The nightmares during the nights,
If only you feel what I feel,
Would you be able to handle,
When your heart breaks a million times,
If only you feel what I feel,
Would you be able to carry on,
Would you be able to endure,
The weight upon your shoulders,
Crushing, overpowering emotions,
If only you feel what I feel,
Would you be able to stop the tears,
Flowing uncontrollably like a waterfall,
Falling constantly, day and night,
If only you feel what I feel,
The broken remains of a life,
Filled with delightful amusements,
Laughter filling the air like before,
Seems like a life time ago,
If only you feel what I feel,
Walking in my shoes for a while,
Would you be able to find the strength,
To carry on through those darkest days,
To always get back up after a fall,
Would you be able to dig deeply,
Fighting until fighting is no more,
Carrying on even in the dark,
To push yourself forward,
When visions are no more,
To feel what I feel,
It only you feel what I feel,
Even if it’s only for a moment,
You shall know exactly,
The turmoil which threathens to erupt.

Written by Tan Nguyen
26th of December 2015

In remembrance of now

In remembrance of now

Timeless adventures, rights of passaged,
Walking through life unprepared,
All the struggles, surviving each battle,
Thoughts of surrender, many times over,
Total destruction of me, unable to succeed.

Everything I had ever experienced,
Every emotions which surged through me,
Every tears that fell, every hurt encountered,
All the suffering being endured,
Every time my heart was ripped out,
Smashed, shattered into a million pieces,
Made me the person I am right now.

Every decisions and every actions,
Led me to where I am right now,
Still standing, though still struggling,
Refusing to be totally beaten,
Hasn’t worked in the past, won’t work now,
In defeating the person who I am,
Maybe broken yet never been destroyed.

Everything which happened in my life,
Every thought which filled my mind,
Every heart beat which beated,
All things negative and positive,
All the lessons that were taught,
All the things my eyes witnessed,
Each moment from the past,
Be it good or bad, played its part,
The person that stands before you,
Experienced all those things,
Just to be me at this very moment,
Nothing more nor nothing less,
Than the person I ought to be,
In this moment in time.

Written by Tan Nguyen
25th of December 2015

Christmas thoughts

What Christmas means to me, my opinion alone.

Christmas doesn’t represent religion nor what’s right or wrong.

It represent what most of us have forgotten, the most valuable thing of all.

Christmas is like Halloween, only in reverse yet the same thoughts.

Halloween is when our naughty side comes out and play, Christmas is when our best behaviour comes to light.

One time of the year, when we put everything aside and re connect with those we love.

Unfortunately, it’s only happens once a year, yet it’s better than none at all.

Cherish those you love, enjoy being together and share these precious moments. Let them know they are loved and what they mean to me. Life is short and fragile, make the most of each others presence.

Writhe by Tan Nguyen

Youthful theatrics

Youthful theatrics

Teenage years spend with ignorance,
Naive and immaturity, perfect combination,
Maybe that is the secret to life,
Finding happiness, being truly free,
Maybe it’s no coincidences,
For those years were really fun.

Recklessness, juvenile behaviours,
Youthful in both acts and deeds,
Having the courage to dream,
Even believing to rule the world,
Innocence in pure form,
At least comparing with now,
Filled with knowledge and facts,
Unrealistic thoughts, barely seen anymore,
Age, gifting with more worries,
Age, being afraid of more things,
A true curse and a blessing.

Flash backs to my past,
Before my mind became so serious,
Eliminating all the fantasy,
Which once upon a time,
Completely filled my mind.

Written by Tan Nguyen
24th of December 2015

Within the mist

Within the mist

Glancing from a far,
Witnessing something never before,
Floating above the ground,
Drifting in the air like clouds,
White mist as thick as mud,
Appearing on the road,
Unable to see beyond,
Creepy feelings, emerging within.

As shivers ran down my spine,
Eerie feelings unable to escape,
Ghastly in appearance,
As if the ghosts has came back to life,
Residing somewhere within the mist,
Ominous feelings, unnerving presence,
Each step taken, further away it seems,
As if it’s walking just ahead of me.

Little did I know, at that time,
The kind of illusions I was in,
Without being aware of this event,
Viewing from afar,
It looked as if I walked into the mist,
Yet my experienced were different,
It looked as if the thickness were less,
To those afar, the thickness consumed me.

Another dimensions perhaps,
Walked into another realm, possibly?
While being in the midst of it all,
Not being aware of it at all,
How could my visions fail so misberly?
How could my mind be tricked so?
Believing my sights,
Affecting my judgments,
Costly error, If only different situation.

Illusions, trapped with the mist,
Unknowingly being surrounded,
Walking through the thickness of it all,
Not realising in doing so,
How could that be?
Mysterious, interesting, exciting thoughts,
Stimulating my imaginations,
Unleasing the creativity eyes,
Pondering upon such matters,
More than the eyes can see,
A world yet untouched by human understandings.

Written by Tan Nguyen
24th of December 2015

Letting moments passing by

Letting moments passing by

Rays of light, streaking the skyline,
Penetrating the vastness of night,
Rising steadily each moment,
Dawn of the new year has finally arrived,
New dreams to dream,
New beginnings to a terrible end,
Rekindling the feelings,
Of hoping once more.

Letting the moments,
Letting it passing by,
A year of awful events,
A year which nightmares were real,
And dreams were no where in sight,
Finding the strength through it all,
Same as finding a diamond,
Deep within the ocean.

Mirrors reflecting the moments,
Each face etched in pain,
Uselessness, nothing to do,
Only watching the events unfolding,
Each scene, dragging it on,
Needlessly, painfully,
Those moments I discovered,
The worst in humans that day.

Letting go, laying to rest,
Unable, being a part of me,
No matter how hard I try to forget,
It shall never come to past,
Changing my perceptions of events,
Turning my weaknesses, into my strengths,
Changing negativity into positivity,
No longer able to hide,
Beneath a rock for years on end,
Can’t turn back time,
Can create and design my future.

Unable to control many things,
Unable to have my way all the time,
Unable to change others opinions,
Unable to stop judgements from others,
Focusing on what I am able,
That is my actions from now on.

Written by Tan Nguyen
24th of December 2015

Eternally resurrected

Eternally resurrected

Darkness fading without farewell,
Perhaps knowing it shall return,
A flicker away from being extinguished,
Struggling to remained breathing,
Facing another day filled with pain,
Emotions of only depressions
Despise of always in despair,
Those feelings, once ruled my realm.

Thanking my blessings each day,
Death was only a flicker away,
With every cell and fibre,
Keeping the flame from going out,
Only a flicker away of being no more,
Scary part was, not caring at all.

From the darkest depths,
The coldest of all places,
Where suffering takes enjoyments,
Where misery walks without shame,
Where happiness is tied up and tortured,
Where dreams go and become nightmares,
Even death refuses to enter this place.

Eternally exhausted, drained and tired,
Eternity is mocking endless,
For not being able to handle the pace,
Somewhere inbetween,
Reignited with such an explosion,
The flames of forever,
The sands of time,
The winds of change,
Are now mine, to claim it as my own,
Earnt my birth right,
To live the rest of my life,
Through the struggles,
Were important lessons,
Through the tears,
Cleaning my eyes,
Through the pain,
Keeping me awake,
Through everything I have experienced,
Purpose came to my door.

Written by Tan Nguyen
23rd of December 2015

Heights never reached

Heights never reached

Soaring higher into the sky,
Higher and higher than ever before,
Unrestrained of Earthly bounds,
Free as freedom ever can be,
Across the blue spaces from above,
High as the eagles in the sky.

As the air rushes by,
Happiness flowing uncontrollably,
Yearning for this moment,
Longing as long as can be,
Droping the worries into the volcanoes,
Burdens unloaded, no longer mine,
Even gravity has no affect,
Unable to even bring me down.

Looking all the way down,
Such a height to fall now,
Shall surely be the end of me,
No intentions of falling anytime soon,
Especially now, after seeing how far I’ve gone.

Written by Tan Nguyen
23rd of December 2015

Feelings of anticipation

Feelings of anticipation

As the morning sun rises,
Lights begun reflecting on armours,
At the head of an army,
There sat Julius Caesar,
The greatest general of all time.

What would it be like, being him,
Sitting upon a horse,
In front of an army, that loves him,
Men already standing,
In battle formation,
What was going through his mind?

The opposite army approaches,
They are now within sight,
Holding onto the fears,
Of seeing so many horses and men,
Being a leader, being composed,
Refusing to let the fears and doubts,
Surfacing, showing on the face,
Remaining absolutely confident in victory,
Boosting the morale of the men you lead.

Does thoughts of death,
Cross his mind at all,
How many of his men shall die,
Does he feel sadden by it,
Does pride have a place,
What else would fill his mind,
The anticipation would be terrible,
Feeling no warmth from the sun,
Studying the enemies formation,
Rearranging the formation,
As weaknesses are spotted,
Many lives are depended on his judgements.

As the army closes the gap,
Maybe after many such battles,
The nervousness, the pressure,
Would be a normal feeling,
When everything is done,
When there’s nothing else to change,
Nothing left to better prepare,
Except for the command to charge.

What makes a man,
Being responsible for so many,
Many lives are in their hands,
Coping with the pressure,
The guilt of it all,
Handling so much, on one’s shoulder,
Having so many responsibilities,
Having so many looking to you for answers,
Being the strength that holds them together,
Looking into eyes,
With so much hope in them,
Such tremendous expectations,
How does anyone, handle so much,
Are people born like this?
Or is it something learnt.

Written by Tan Nguyen
23rd of December 2015